Oct 27, 2009

Bush Discusses Successful Rugs

George W. Bush made his first post-presidential speaking appearance yesterday at "Get Motivated!" Seriously. And he brought the "A" material.

Bush used much of his 28 minutes onstage to talk about lighter topics such as picking out a rug design for the Oval Office that reflected his "optimism.".

Word. Most leaders start from the rug up. Hitler actually had a rug that reflected his "negativity."

Bush noted that "popularity is fleeting. . . . It's not real."

Totally. When everyone hates you - it's fake.

I can tell you that one of the most amazing surprises of the presidency was the fact that people's prayers affected me. I can't prove it to you. But I can tell you some days were great, some days not so great. But every day was joyous." That, he attributed, to the prayers of others.

Check. Get other people to pray for me - right after I get the rug. This shit is gold.

"He is just a normal guy! He wasn't the best speaker. But I was happy to see him!" said Lubbock salesman Patrick Kruger, 50.

Consider yourself motivated.


Inferno Silver said...

i'm the 1st to admit that i don't really get the whole "motivation" bizness, but what in the hell is this supposed to be, some kind of "scared straight" thing?

André said...

motivation is something for weak retards.
they get some retard on stage who proceeds to talk about his shitty retarded life up to the point when he almost comited suicide, and bam!, you're motivated not to end um like him.
its pretty much the same voyeristic bullshit as "american idol" or "extreme makeover" that people watch just so they can sleep at night, knowing that there is someone worst then them