Seriously, this is the last fucking thing we need. I really have zero interest in becoming a demon fighter, especially during the summer time. But we really are not going to have a choice in the matter, as it appears a Hellmouth is opening in Ventura, California.
A patch of land in Ventura County where the ground heated up to more than 800 degrees Friday continues to puzzle firefighters and geologists.
It's a thermal anomaly," said Ron Oatman, spokesman for the Ventura County Fire Department.
Right. It's a thermal anomaly until a halfrek-vengeance demon comes forth.
The firefighters and geologists who surveyed the two-acre plot north of Fillmore are uncertain what's causing the heat, but they have some theories.
The area is considered an active landslide that in the last 60 years has moved and trapped hydrocarbons, found in petroleum products, natural gas and coal, some several hundred feet deep, Oatman said. After it dried out, the earth began to crack and oxygen crept in, causing "some sort of combustion," he said.
These idiots are clueless. At least I'm not the food on the front line.